From “Impossible” to “Possible

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When Rose joined the UK Armed Forces Spouse Personal Development Programme, she felt frustrated, deflated, and unsure of her future.

After spending much of her adult life living overseas with her partner while raising their family, her career had been repeatedly disrupted. She found herself in a job she didn’t want to continue in – and with several passions pulling her in different directions, she felt unable to choose a path forward.

Her goal was simple but powerful:
to gain clarity, build confidence, and feel better about where she was heading in life.

What she didn’t expect was how quickly her mindset would begin to shift.

During the programme, Rose realised she didn’t actually have to choose between her two very different passions – starting a baking business and working in a special care nursery. Instead, she discovered that these dreams could exist on different timelines. She could take steps toward both, while keeping financial stability through her part-time role.

This reframing lifted a visible weight from her shoulders.

Reflecting on the change, Rose shared:

“Two months ago I was sitting here thinking I just can’t decide what I want to do. I felt so deflated and wondered if it was even worth bothering with.
Now I feel motivated, clear, and certain that I’m going to do this because it’s what I want. That change in two months is vast.”

She went on:

“I feel so refreshed and motivated. I used to have positive thoughts, but they were drowned out by ‘you can’t do it, you can’t afford it, it’ll take too long.’
Now I think, ‘How can I do it?’ I know it might take time – and that’s okay. It’s a completely different frame of mind.”

Perhaps most powerful of all was Rose’s shift from limitation to possibility:

“The word impossible used to constantly fly around my head – and it’s completely gone.
Everything feels possible now. You said we can have it all, just not all at once. That was massive for me. If other people can do it, I can do it.”

When asked what helped create this change, Rose pointed to the session on identifying barriers – laying them out, examining them, and realising that while obstacles may exist, there are always ways around them.

What Rose gained wasn’t just career clarity.

She gained self-belief.
She gained perspective.
She gained permission to move forward in her own way, at her own pace.

It is deeply inspiring to witness what happens when Armed Forces spouses give themselves the time and space to reflect, grow, and reconnect with who they are. Rose’s journey is a powerful example of resilience, imagination, and determination – creating a future on her own terms, even within the challenges of service life.

Rose, you do get to choose – every step of the way.
Your courage and commitment to yourself are truly inspiring.

Ready to take your own first step?

If you are an Armed Forces spouse feeling stuck, uncertain, or ready for change, the UK Armed Forces Spouse Personal Development Programme offers coaching, community, and compassionate support to help you rediscover confidence and direction.

You don’t need to have it all figured out.
You just need to begin.

👉 Find out more here:
https://yournewwings.com/uk-armed-forces-spouse-personal-development-programme/

Peace of mind can be found in the strangest places

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For me, once, it was in my shoe.

In 2011 our family moved from Australia to Brazil for my husband’s work. Our kids were just five and seven, and we went from suburban Melbourne life to São Paulo – a city of 12 million people. For a farm girl, it was a seismic shift.

I had to learn Portuguese, navigate driving on the opposite side of the road, and juggle all the emotional and logistical layers that come with being a trailing spouse: finding schools, creating routine, building community, and wondering who I was in the midst of so much upheaval.

There are many stories I could tell from our time in Brazil, but this one is about being in search of peace of mind.

The Lifeline I Hid in My Shoe

São Paulo was vibrant and beautiful, but also unpredictable. Carjackings were a daily reality. We drove a bullet-proof car. The road outside our kids highly regarded international school was known for bank robberies.

Inside our apartment compound I felt secure.
Outside, especially with the kids with me, I was constantly scanning, planning, preparing for possibilities.

One day, while mentally rehearsing “escape” scenarios, it hit me:
If I lost my phone or was mugged, I would have no way to call for help.

So I asked myself:
What do I need to feel safe?

Two answers came instantly:

• My husband’s phone number
• The 24-hour emergency number for my husband’s company’s head of security

Those two numbers were my lifeline.
But then came the practical question:

Where do you keep something you must never lose?

I realised the one thing that always went everywhere with me — even on the most stressful days — was my shoes.

So I made tiny labels with those phone numbers and tucked them under the inner soles of every pair I owned. For sandals and Havaianas, I wrote the numbers in permanent marker.

Such a small thing… and yet it changed everything.

I suddenly felt prepared.

More in control.

More able to step into the “outside world” without tension sitting permanently on my shoulders.

I had given myself peace of mind.

The Part I was Embarrassed to Admit

Looking back, I can smile at the ingenuity of hiding phone numbers in my shoes – but at the time, I was embarrassed to tell anyone.

I didn’t want to admit that I needed a lifeline.
That I wasn’t fully in control.
That I was afraid.

But wanting to feel safe is human.
Especially when we are responsible for small people who trust us with their whole world.

Fast Forward to the English Midlands 

Four years later, we moved again – this time to the UK.

In some ways it was easier:

• I spoke the language (well… Australian!)
• Our boys were older
• The environment felt familiar and non-threatening

And yet, something unexpected happened.
With no expat structure around me, no “new arrivals” community, no support for hearts and minds… the transition was, in some ways, harder.

Once again, I found myself in search of peace of mind.

I didn’t reach for a Sharpie and my shoes this time.
Instead, I reached out to my coach — someone who could help me sort through the swirling questions, unsteadiness, and identity shifts that come with relocation.

Those conversations grounded me.
Just like the numbers in my shoe once had.

What I’ve Learned

After two international moves and years of supporting other spouses through their transitions, here’s what I know for sure:

• Having someone to turn to makes all the difference.
• Access to community and local insight reduces stress dramatically.
• A single “lifeline” — emotional or practical — can be the difference between coping and flourishing.
• When families feel supported, employees thrive in their roles.
• Spouses who feel safe, connected, and informed adapt far more quickly and confidently.

Relocation is never just logistical.
It is emotional.
Psychological.
Identity-shifting.

And everyone deserves a lifeline.

What’s in your shoe?

So I’ll leave you with the question that shaped my own journey:

What do you need to feel at peace?

Update: If you’re navigating your own transition or simply searching for a bit more peace of mind, I invite you to explore the Your New Wings Hub – a space created with spouses and for spouses. Inside, you’ll find community, resources, courses, and support designed to help you feel grounded, connected, and confident as you find your own next steps. You don’t have to do this alone.
👉 Join us inside the Hub.